carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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