i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Randomize