Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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