Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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