therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Randomize
