I wish I only lived at night.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
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