she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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