dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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