How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
