That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
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