The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize