Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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