I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Randomize
