i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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