Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize