How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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