white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Randomize
