I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
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