It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
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