He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Randomize
