Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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