Whoa Z and x make the same sound
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
