why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Randomize
