Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
We are two peas in an std pod
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
