I want to make a zoo with you.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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