my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
