dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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