So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
