I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Randomize
