woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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