I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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