i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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