So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
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I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
We have started to decorate penises.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
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I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
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