Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
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No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
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Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night