It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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