girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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