addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
