Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
COCAINE IS GR8
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
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