found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
It was a blind-side dick pic.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
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