you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize