Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Randomize
