HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Why are your pants in the freezer?
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
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