the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
