I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
