dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
