Where did you get a picture of my penis
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
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