Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
