I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
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