Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
