I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize