Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
