Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
