im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
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